The Great Wall

By James Bridgewood

The heed bloke said to Hadrian, when he’d had aboot enough.

“There’s bother on the moors again, these buggers are too tough!”

“We’ve conquered all them Greeks”,he said, “no problems there at all.”

“But these Geordie are all off tha heads, we’ll have to build a wall!”

“A wall?” said he Incredulously, “just get the buggers telt!”

“But boss thas not just Geordies there, thas hairy Pics and Celts!”

“Tha scared of nowt and love to clout Centurions at night.”

“We’ll never beat these loony louts in any fisty fights!”

“Okay okay, you have your way, I see you’re roond the bend.”

“The men can start at Carlisle, and can finish at Wallsend.”

So work commenced that Monday, just as much as they could handle.

With double time on Sundays, and a brand new pair of sandals.

“I like this wall said Hadrian, it has such strength and style.”

“But I want great watch towers built at every single mile.

“For Christ’s sake” mumbled the forman, “your gannin straights man Haid.”

“Whey the lads have got geet blisters, from all the stones they’ve laid.”

But forman’s whimpered whispers merely fell on deafened ears.

So each night til late,to compensate, he would doon a load of beers.

With workers now half round the bend and half dead upon their feet.

The wall at last came to an end just down from Hunter street.

But over time things took their toll and the wall was in decay.

And the locals bit by bit they ”stole” those precious stones away.

These days there’s little left to show, what gave the Romans fame.

They had a go,but now they know that Geordies can’t be tamed!